Overheard in the restroom line at the Ren Faire...

A young woman was talking to her mother about how her son has hit the terrible twos and she's certain he gets his bad behavior from his father… 

Young Woman: Did I throw fits all the time?

Her Mother: Yes. All the time. I used to have to call your dad at work to talk to you.

YW: But that's not because I was horrible; it's because I wanted my daddy.

HM: You were horrible.

YW: I was sweet, though.

HM: Honey, you put a puppy in the oven.