"I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read in the train."

Tonight I headed downtown for a delightful evening of Oscar Wilde's finest work. I couldn't help myself from mouthing along some of the lines of dialogue, and as I was sitting in the front row, I hope I didn't distract the actors. The play was an utter delight!

"Mr. Worthing! Rise, sir, from this semi-recumbent posture; it is most indecorous!" was just one of the things I was silently saying along with Lady Bracknell.

"You are the most advanced Bunburyist I know."

"Thirty-five is a very attractive age. London society is full of women of the highest birth who have, of their own free choice, remained 35 for years."

Lady Bracknell was played by Sian Phillips, who played the vicious, scheming Livia in "I, Claudius." She doesn't look much older than when she played the wicked empress all those years ago.

And now I want to go watch the Colin Firth/Rupert Everett version and see Judi Dench deliver those withering lines in all her frosty glory.

The Big 8

Tonight, I went to see Nebraska, which, in addition to being a very good film, was the last one I needed to see in order to complete what I call the Big 8 Oscar categories (Best Picture and Director, the two screenplay categories, and the four acting categories.)

This is a huge hurdle in my quest to be Oscar ready, and I've noticed something. To quote Princess Anna of Arendelle, for the first time in forever I think there's a clear winner in all of the acting categories, and in Best Picture and Director, too. Here's my take:

Best Actor and Best Supporting Actor: the men of the Dallas Buyer's Club

This was the performance of a career for Matthew McConaughey, which isn't necessarily enough to get you an Oscar, but this time it is. He was the best of a great bunch. And I can't believe I'm saying Jordan Catalano deserves an Oscar, but, you guys, Jordan Catalano deserves an Oscar. The only performance that came close to his was probably Fassbender's and he traumatized me too much. 

Best Actress: Cate Blanchett for Blue Jasmine

Did you see this? I didn't want to. It's Woody Allen, and I am not a fan. It looked boring to me from the synopsis. It is not boring. It is fascinating. You can't look away. Cate Blanchett is off the rails and it is wondrous to watch. Meryl is the queen and Judi is the empress, but no one was better than Cate Blanchett. This is hers.

Best Supporting Actress: Lupita Nyong'o for 12 Years a Slave

Oh, you guys, oh. This performance. This performance. I am still haunted. Jennifer Lawrence’s delightful speech notwithstanding, if I had seen this movie before the Golden Globes I would have been incensed, incensed, that they gave her the award instead of Lupita. This performance is one of the most stunning I have seen on film. Not just this year, but ever. There is no discussion to be had; give her the Oscar.

Best Picture and Best Director: 12 Years a Slave, and its director, Steve McQueen

Have you seen it yet? Be prepared. It is harrowing, even more than you're expecting, and it will stay with you for a long time. For days afterward, I couldn't think of anything else. Everything about it is just about perfect, from the cast to the script (it ought to win that, too) to the pacing. A story masterfully by a talented director. I can't imagine any other film winning.

So, that's my prediction thus far. I've also completed the Film Editing and Production Design categories, but I've got 14 more categories to go. Time to delve into the documentaries. I love this time of year!

Well, that certainly helps with that fear.

New Sherlock tonight!

This gifset ends in the most satisfying way.

Episode 2 tonight!

Eat anything you want, just cook it yourself.

This is a fascinating idea. Michael Pollan, author of many books on how most of us are eating hideous things that should not be classified as actual food, gave a short talk just how life-changing it can be to simply cook for yourself. Then some brilliant and clever person illustrated it beautifully. Definitely worth your two and a half minutes.

I write this as I am about to leave to go out to dinner. Boo.

The Golden Globes

It’s the Golden Globes! The pre-Oscars, where the humor is better, the nominees get drunker as the evening progresses, and there’s always the chance for a surprise winner because the voting pool is, like, 80 people.

Favorite Moments:

These two. It wasn’t as funny as last year, but they still knocked it out of the park.

Julia Louis-Dreyfus being hilarious in the intro.

Matt Damon’s charming self-deprecation. “It’s me, the garbage man. The garbage man who didn’t bring his glasses. Fantastic.”

Jonah Hill, tellin' it like it is.

Jennifer Lawrence’s speech. "I did watch all of the movies this year... Not all of them, but you know what I mean." Give her all the awards so we can hear her give more speeches.

Vince Gilligan letting Aaron Paul have the last (salty) word when accepting the Best Drama award for Breaking Bad.

Tina Fey’s magnificent callback to last year’s controversy, congratulating Amy Poehler on her win by telling her there’s a special place in hell for her. Heh.

Emma Thompson, taking off her heels because she just couldn’t take it anymore. Every woman there is wearing shoes of pain. It’s nice to see someone admit it.

I’m so sick of American Horror Story getting away with being a mini-series and thus participating in categories that are less competitive than serial TV categories. That is such crap. So I was so happy when Elisabeth Moss beat Jessica Lange (who sulked through her speech like a brat) for Best Actress in a Mini-Series. Also, Elisabeth Moss was really very good in Top of the Lake and actually deserved the award, so I’m not just happy for catty reasons.

Seth Meyers being so excited to present an award to his friend, Andy Samberg.

Finally getting pronunciation confirmation on Chiwetel Ejiofor’s name.

Least Favorite Moments:

It takes an eternity for the TV people to get up to the stage and that just reinforces the unspoken caste system here. They couldn’t clear a path along the sides for them or something? Imagine trying to navigate a maze of Idris Elbas and Leonardo DiCaprios in 4-inch heels and a corseted dress when you’re already a little tipsy. We should be amazed Jacqueline Bisset made it up there at all. Speaking of which…

Jaqueline Bisset’s neverending speech. I get that you’re overwhelmed, but stop with drama-filled pauses. No one thinks this is cool.

Let It Go loses Best Song. I never thought I’d begrudge U2 an award, but the HFPA has terrible taste in music. Maybe the awesome gets lost in translation.

Diane Keaton droning on and on and oooonnnnn about Woody Allen. Whatever whatever I just don’t care you’re talking like you’re a little bit drunk now you’re singing why are you singing make it stop!


Now for the dresses...

Looks I loved:

Margot Robbie, whom I have never heard of, but apparently she's in The Wolf of Wall Street.

Those crystals sparkled so perfectly when she moved (See the .gif with Jonah Hill, above. Sparkly!). Wish the slit wasn’t so slitty, but aside from that it’s a really lovely dress, and probably my favorite of the night.

Kate Beckinsale, who was inexplicably presenting the music awards alongside Diddy and Usher.

Perfect fit, which accounts for so, so much, and I love that it looks like an Art Deco cigarette case, but a little too plunge-y in the neckline department.

Lupita Nyong'o, from 12 Years a Slave.

Perfect shade of red, sleek, beautiful.

Robin Wright (or as she will always be to me, Buttercup, who was raised on a small farm in the country of Florin...)

This was really beautiful, but when she went up on stage the halter moved all around and showed some of her underpinnings. Double-sided tape is your friend.

Taylor Swift, who seems generally awful but has great clothes.

I find her grating, but she has an amazing stylist because she is always well dressed.

Kerry Washington, who sets an unattainable standard of perfection, even when pregnant.

My goodness, but she's lovely.

Laura Carmichael, who puts up with a lot of crap from the Downton writers, in my opinion.

Lady Edith, good gracious!

Looks I did not enjoy:

Paula Patton, who is far too beautiful to look this hideous.

Those ruffles are eating you alive and I'm just afraid they may come for me next.

Emma Stone, who really ought to have known better.

No.

Zoe Saldana, with whom I really oughtn't to be surprised.

I found myself squinting at the TV and asking, “Are those… are those brooches?”

It’s just as bad from the back. Andie Walsh should be no one's style guru.

Drew Barrymore, who is probably trying her best.

I think she’s marvelous, and also she’s pregnant, so it pains me to say it, but this looks like a crafty project gone wrong. Like, when you’ve spent all day hunched over your vellum and your paper punches and the glue is starting to get to you and it’s all coming out wrong and you think with disgust, “I could have just gone to the movies today!” That’s this dress.

And that’s it for the Globes. Oscar noms are announced on Thursday. Things are about to get crazy with my movie-viewing schedule.

Movie Day

Over the Christmas break, Julia made me watch her new DVD The Croods with her, and I came upon the depressing realization that it was the only Golden Globe nominated movie I’d seen. The Oscars noms will be coming soon and I’m woefully unprepared. So, in a desperate attempt to get a jump on what may be nominated for Oscars, I had a movie day yesterday.

I figured I’d better see this before it’s out of theaters. The black hole between theater release and DVD release has wrecked many an Oscar-readiness attempt. I enjoyed it a lot more than I thought I would. The visuals are stunning and the story was unexpectedly moving. Also, after being reminded what a dreadful, horrifying void space is, I felt anew the amazement that NASA was able to rescue astronauts Lovell, Swigert, and Haise. Space is a nightmare.

I didn’t enjoy this as much as I thought I would. I loved the clothes and the music (it has got a marvelous 70s soundtrack), but it felt like the story was trying to be Goodfellas or Casino with the voiceover narration and telling of a true but retro story, and it wasn’t as good as either of those movies. Also I felt like Christian Bale was doing a DeNiro impersonation the whole time and I wanted to slap Bradley Cooper every single moment he was onscreen, which is a new experience for me.

I love the Coen Brothers. If you love them, you will love this film. It’s more in the vein of Barton Fink and A Serious Man than Fargo and Raising Arizona. But the real star is the soundtrack. I downloaded it as soon as the credits began to roll.

I capped it all off with a midnight showing of the 1984 masterpiece The Neverending Story, and left the theater with this wonderful sound in my ears:

Did anyone else catch this?

Before leaving my wonderful Christmas vacation behind, I took Jules to see Frozen. I loved it. Beautiful animation, great music, funny, moving, the whole deal. But there was something I missed.

Take a look at this photo of the visitors arriving at Elsa’s coronation. See anything familiar here?

Look to the left:

That's FLYNN and RAPUNZEL!!!!!! Aaaaahhhhhh!

My mind is blown and Disney lit the dynamite.