I don't follow celebrity gossip, because it makes me feel weird and stalkerish, but I innocently went to Yahoo today to search on shower curtains and I was hit in the face with the breaking news that supermodel Gisele Bundchen (did I spell that correctly?) has wed Patriots QB Tom Brady. First I said to myself, "Isn't he dating Jessica Simpson?" and then I responded to myself, "No, that's the other quarterback from the other team I hate."
But I have to say, I was dismayed for Miss Gisele. Even if you don't despise the Patriots with every fiber of your being like I do (and if not, what is wrong with you?) and even if you don't think Tom Brady gives off serious sociopath vibes (I declare that there is nothing but cold death behind those eyes), the fact remains that Gisele dated Leonardo DiCaprio for, like, decades. To experience that and then end up First Lady of the New England Patriots? Well, you've got your "something blue" all wrapped up there, Mrs. Brady.
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