So tonight I finally sat down to watch a DVD Brian lent me, The Warriors. Brian loves this movie and has since he was a kid. And it is a movie with a huge cult following. However, Melis would describe this film by using word "crap" as every possible part of speech. I hesitate to comment on something that has been the lynchpin of disagreement in their marriage, but this cannot be ignored.
I actually really like the premise. This group of guys has to get from the Bronx to Coney Island (and that is a looong way, babies) with every gang in the city gunning for them. Good premise, lots of potential. The execution, though? Oh no. This film was written, directed, and most importantly costumed by someone who has absolutely no idea what the term "street gang" means.
The film opens with footage of various "gangs" making their way to the Bronx for a gang meeting. I sensed something was amiss when I saw the guys in the hot pink sequined vests, but my suspicions were confirmed by the appearance of a gang of mimes in white pancake make-up, suspenders, and top hats.
Take a moment and let that sink in.
The only thing missing were the little robot silhouettes at the bottom of the screen. Three minutes into the film and the director had already lost me.
But then! We see the gang conference, where approximately 179 gangs of 9 guys each have converged in the Bronx for a smorgasbord of costume delight. We have the gang in jaunty French striped boatneck shirts, the gang in skin-tight purple unitards with matching knit caps, and the gang who goes shirtless and wears porkpie hats. And let us not forget "the most powerful gang in the city." To flaunt their authority they choose to attire themselves in... flowing silk robes.
I have news for you, gentleman. The Bloods are going to kill you all.
Look, I am sympathetic to the poor woman who had to come up with dozens of individual types of gang attire for this scene, but the moment she gave me the face-painted dudes in the baseball uniforms and the guys in the sheepskin vests, I entered the realm of the ridiculous and there was no clawing my way back.
People, this is the type of thing I am dealing with:
You know you look ridiculous, right?
9 comments:
The robots are a necessity. Oh, what fun they'd have!
This sounds like the type of movie that is just too awful for MST3K to cover. Because even they have standards.
My blood began to boil as soon as I saw your first picture!
I feel the need to state that though Allison is often a prime example of human hyperbole, NOTHING has been exaggerated here. Those truly are the gangs, people! I mean, C'MON! Even the gangs from the "Beat It" video would kick their butts. I believe the Sharks and Jets might even stand a chance.
I do not know why you didn’t listen to me and skip this flick. That is 2 hours of your life you're never getting back. Perhaps that is punishment enough. My sadness is in the fact that now you’re sure to return the movie.
Listen, I've never seen this. I just want to point out that if someone (who had never watched it as a child) watched Labyrinth today they would be totally weirded out. you know?
maybe this just didn't age well :)
Melis, yes I'm bringing it back. It will reenter your movie collection tomorrow. Sorry about that.
Liz, yes it definitely did not age well. That is a factor. But I think it had fundamental problems beyond that, which are proven beyond a reasonable doubt by that baseball player pic alone.
Alas, much to my sadness, a lot of movies I loved as a child didn't age well. It pains me to say that Goonies might be among them. This new generation just doesn't appreciate it. And Labyrinth... well, it's hard for even a child of the 80s to get past David Bowie's pants.
You remind me of the babe...
What babe?
the babe of teh power
What power?
Post a Comment